Learn to Lead

Essential tips to improve your marriage

Without strong families, we can’t have strong societies. The family is the foundation. And the husband is the head of the home, so that’s why I help men learn to lead better.

In this interview, a recent graduate from my Marriage Mastery program shares his journey.

What were you frustrated by/struggling with before joining?

Before joining the programme, I was looking for direction and guidance as to how best to lead my future wife and family.

I was unclear at the time as to what it meant to be a man, and did not have many role models of strong male leadership in my life.

Where are you with all that now?

I am clearer on the male roles of protecting, providing, and procreating. Ultimately, I understand my role as husband is to help get my wife and future children (God-willing, if we are graced to have them) to Heaven.

Leading as a husband means leading in all areas of family life, and taking responsibility for caring for my wife in the physical, spiritual, intellectual, social, and emotional domains.

It also involves romance – and as one of the core phrases in the programme says, ‘Either lead, or lose.’ This applies to all facets of life, and taking it all head-on, as that is what I’ve been created to do.

Can you share any of the difference at home/work, including internally and spiritually?

I am more in command and on top of all aspects of home life, organising and making sure that everything is taken care of so that my wife can thrive – finances, timing, prayer schedule, food, etc.

I am aware of the gaps in leadership/command that are unfilled, and try to proactively address those.

Additionally, I have dressed better and got in much better consistent shape – while now understanding why these are important; these have both made a world of difference.

Perhaps the biggest differences, however, are that I don’t complain – and when any arguments begin to bubble, I listen. This would not have happened prior, and they have both changed how my wife sees me.

Overall, I am more confident in leading, and feel like I have a ‘map’ for how a marriage should work. Spiritually, it feels as though this is who God is calling me to be.

Where do you think you'd be compared to now if you hadn't joined?

I’d be edging overweight, unsure of myself, and ‘being the second woman in the relationship’. I wouldn’t be aware of the importance of holding the line, or of dressing well – and ensuring that my wife does, too. There are a thousand mini things that have happened, or been avoided, for the better – because of the map I now have for how to be.

How did it feel before?

Confusing, daunting, terrifying – as I didn’t want to end up in a woman-dominated marriage, as my parents’ has been for the last (nearly) forty years. I’d be seeking to live the lie of ‘happy wife, happy life.’

How does it feel now?

Now – I feel like I am much more aware of the dynamics between my wife and I, and how I need to lead. I have an idea of where, who, and how I want to be – and I’m laying the foundations for the future. It is very reassuring.

How do you think it will benefit you & your family into the future?

At every level – physically, socially, intellectually, emotionally, spiritually, and financially. I will be more able to ‘protect, provide, and procreate!’

What do you love most about the program?

Community and simplicity. No b*******. Genuine goodwill and men trying to help one another – there is real generosity in the community.

Why do you think it's better than counselling/therapy?

Action-based, not whining-based.

Considering you've got lifetime membership and the content is always evolving, was it worth the money?

Absolutely. 100%.

What would you say to someone thinking about joining?

Go for it. You won’t regret it – and even if you do, you can have your money back!

To learn more, click here:

https://www.patriarchy.com