39 Lessons for Men in their 30s
Some reflections on my birthday
I’ve just turned 39, so here are 39 life lessons for men in their 30s to help you destroy vice and build virtue.
I’ll keep this very brief and high impact.
Make a point of persevering in little things.
Notice how HARD persevering in little things is, and let it develop a humble mistrust of yourself. This helps kill pride.
Moderate effort over a long time with patience and consistency will get you further than burning yourself out will.
Be grateful for your troubles. An easy life builds complacency, not masculinity.
Do your daily duties with courage and a clear focus. That’s the only way you’ll win people’s respect.
Most modern books aren’t worth your time. If it’s written after WW2, you probably shouldn’t bother with it.
In reading and in life, concentrate on fewer things in greater depth.
If it’s not in the Bible or St. Thomas Aquinas, don’t think about it too much.
Cultivate more humility and penance in your daily life.
Figure out how little you can live on, and then do that — even if you earn a lot more.
Instead of living in the future, bear your burden well each day. And then the future will take care of itself.
Make a special effort to be joyful when you feel sad. Don’t let your moods master you.
Who are you familiar with and why? Are they helping you get to heaven? If not, what’s the point of the relationship?
Read ten Psalms a day, and you’ll get through them all fortnightly.
Each day, read one chapter of the Old Testament and one chapter of the New Testament.
Go to confession monthly.
Impose little difficulties on your kids to help them learn to suffer well.
Track how you allocate your time across the whole week, 24/7. It will reveal your priorities.
Never share your opinions for the mere pleasure of doing so. Silence is more masculine.
Always be reserved in your opinions and in the way you express them.
You don’t owe everyone an explanation.
Avoid hurry and worry in your affairs. It signals weakness to everyone around you, especially your enemies.
Don’t overthink your health. Walking 10,000+ steps a day. Lift weights 2+ times a week. Keep your waist under half your height.
Automate your finances. When you get paid, save first, and then live off the rest.
Minimise discussion. Prioritise action.
Don’t make rules you don’t really keep — for yourself or for others.
When you get very eager and excited about anything, stop.
Withhold judgment when you’re not obliged to give it. And remember you’re very rarely obliged to give it.
You’re strong only when you’re aware of your own weaknesses and limitations.
Be quick to believe yourself mistaken.
Avoid hasty decisions.
Accept criticism without resentment.
Most people accomplish very little because they aim at too much due to pride.
Curiosity is usually veiled effeminacy.
Starve your mind sometimes. No books, no internet.
Recall your past failings before starting new undertakings.
Expect people to let you down, and don’t hold it against them when they do. Move on.
Focus more on your own flaws than on those of other people.
The thought of death is the best reality check.
Great wisdom in your list. Happy birthday.
These are gold. Thanks, Will.